As the old year ends and a new one begins it occurred to me we experience a great many endings as we move through life.
Since many of these are not of our choosing, man in his desire to make the unpleasant more palatable created a refrain to serve these occasions.
“When one door closes another opens.”
I imagine there aren’t too many of us that has not spoken those words to ease the disappointment of a favored activity, job or life experience suddenly coming to an end.
What I myself have found is that many of these endings come not at our choosing but at the whim of others.
Many times this circumstance leaves us standing shocked or surprised and in need of believing it’s all for the best.
Yet is it really? Always for the best I mean.
When something we’ve enjoyed doing for years is suddenly removed from our lives. Is it best that we are left with a big gaping hole where that positive energy once lived?
Can we always find a substitution for the moments we so enjoyed that are now stripped from our routines?
A friend is retiring from teaching now after fifty years and boy it’s not looking very easy.
She is finding as with everything filling gaps seems to be so much easier when you’re young. I imagine this is because opportunities arise more often when you are strong and vital.
Filling a gap in one’s life isn’t hard when the world is open and filled with untold adventures ahead.
But when you’re older, maybe not so much.
When you’ve had moments you looked forward to and enjoyed stripped away through no choice of your own, replenishing them can be tricky.
So we are left with a hole where fun and joy once dwelled now covered over by only a memory.
In the beginning optimism enters like a shoulder to cry on. Oh well, I suppose it’s time to move on. Nothing lasts forever and everything happens for the good.
But does it really? Especially when you’re older and finding ways to fill our days may not be as easy or productive despite how much we try.
The last thing we want to do is allow the feeling of negativity to enter where that positive energy once flowed. To feel that a treasured job or activity that brought us such joy is now gone and something has left us that cannot be replaced.
That feeling of loss is what we must rail against. So is replacing what we once had the only way to restore joy to our lives?
Is losing that job or activity going to linger and create a bad memory after so many years of cultivating good ones?
Do we want to be left in the end with only the loss and not all the years of gain?
Many times it’s not about money. It’s about feeling useful or positive about something. It may be a hobby that makes you feel a sense of accomplishment.
So we sit and ponder what might fill that gap. What do we need to do to feel those useful or satisfied feelings once more?
Is there anything that can bring back what is now lost?
How do we find that perfect replacement?
I’ve thought long and hard at these times about what to do next. What opportunities are open to me at the stage of life where I am now.
As we reach a certain age we all come face to face with certain facts about our existence. Our skills in certain areas have kind of cast us out of professions we may once have considered, even part time.
Let’s face it, the world changes as we trudge along. Sure we do our best to keep up, but sadly keeping up is not excelling.
We use our Iphones and computers with a sense of pride that we were able to adapt to this new technology, but would Google or Apple or any of the other companies that are now running the world employ us? Or would we even have a clue what they are all about?
I’m thinking a big no on that one. Ordering from Amazon is not the same level as inventing the next big thing in Virtual Reality beyond Oculus.
Believe me I’m not suggesting jobs are an issue for Baby Boomers. Most of us have retired or work part time as a hobby. This is about the things we found that fill our time once we left the workforce. The choices we made that we now don’t want to lose.
What can we do if anything to change the outcome of decisions made for us instead of with us?
No one can argue that life has many potholes in the roads we travel.
So what do we do when we hit one we didn’t see coming?
Do we lie there in the road and stop moving? Or do we call a tow truck, fix the car and keep driving?
Yet if we can choose, why wouldn’t we?
Exhausting all efforts to save what means something to us is paramount and the easiest way to move forward.
Despite the immediate feeling of loss, setting new goals will turn into a positive outcome.
I always felt that staring at a brick wall, we miss seeing the open path at our side. Although challenging, freeing up time to bring more interesting and fun things into our day can prove to be very positive indeed. It just takes a bit of effort but the rewards are plentiful.
So if a door closes, turn your head and feel the breeze blowing on you from that newly opened window.
In the new year I hope all your moments are filled with only good things and open windows galore.
Published by
Published
