The other day as I was picking up my prescriptions at Walgreens and checking out the cane selection I suddenly stopped. Out of nowhere, it occurred to me that I had accumulated more medical supplies than an Urgent Care.
The thought truly caused my head to spin with the knowledge of how much of my home space was now covered in pills, pill holders, canes, and a walker, which I hesitated to throw away in case my other knee refused to work. My refrigerator is filled with gel-filled masks and under-eye patches, a freezer full of ice packs and bathroom drawers filled with pain patches, band-aids, gauze, ace bandages to fit every part of my body, creams, lotions, and gels for all and any ailment imaginable in the human condition.
And lest we forget the ready supply of heating pads, heating booties, around-the-neck microwavable heat pillows, and anything that will warm and fit around all body parts. And heaven forbid we go to bed without our night guard to protect our fragile teeth.
Yet truly I’m healthy. Do people who are ill have to move into larger homes to accommodate all their medical supplies?
I never really noticed all this paraphernalia because unless you need it who pays attention?
But now that I’m paying attention, I’m asking myself, “What the Hell?”
Forget the cost of all this equipment, what stuns me is when did my life switch from English bone China, fabulous clothes, drooling over gorgeous jewelry and handbags to “Oh boy, there’s a two-for-one sale on Tums today?”
When did I stop shopping for relaxing spas and start filling my house with heartburn meds and probiotics?
When did my life change from Xbox to ex-lax?
When does your husband switch from picking up flowers to picking up your prescriptions?
When did my stomach become less about Spanx and more about stool softeners?
So I had to take a beat to ponder how much life had changed. How much the different stages of our lives can be sized up by simply glancing around one’s home and the items in abundance.
When you are single your closets are filled with high-heels, fabulous bags, and the latest styles.
Now it’s about what shoes don’t kill your feet and a bag that won’t be too heavy to carry when filled.
In the children stage you had baby gear, then teen objects. Then when they left for college it was, oh boy room for more stuff now.
And what was the stuff? Tennis racquets, golf clubs, swimming gear, beachwear, and lots of SPF creams. Suitcases for travel and brochures for Europe, cruises, and proof of wanderlust.
Then came your grandchildren and your home was suddenly filled once again with toys, diapers, and kid stuff.
There is a constant change of cycles occurring except for one sad fact.
The one where your house is suddenly a medical supply store won’t revert to toys and travel brochures ever again.
You have become brutally aware that elasticity has nothing to do with your skin now, but something to wrap around a sore knee or elbow.
One of my kitchen counters now replicates my mother’s house and is filled with meds to take each day.
It happens so subtly we aren’t even aware it’s happening. Then boom, one day we’re wandering around CVS thinking, gosh I spend a lot of money here. And even sadder a lot of time.
So what are we to do to keep our age stuff from literally driving us out of our own homes?
Would putting it in pretty containers hide its purpose? Would trying to limit it all to only a few select spaces in your home avoid having to see it as a constant reminder that the toys and high heel portion of life concluded while we weren’t looking?
Maybe there are some unique and clever ways to hide the “stuff” from our constant gaze. Perhaps we could make it look less intrusive and fill drawers instead.
Yet, just as when we were young so many of us had to keep stuff “just in case,” so it is now.
Sure, you don’t need that walker from your knee surgery, but what if you fall? You don’t need the drug store stash of stomach meds and wound healing equipment, but what if? I mean if you cut yourself are you going to run out and buy gauze at that moment? No, and that stuff was always in your home in case your kids scraped a knee, or you injured yourself cutting a bagel. Or that new pair of shoes was causing a blister on your heel.
Yet why does the, it’s just there in case, feel so unsettling when once it felt reassuring?
On the positive side, all those meds we pop each day help us live longer and experience a higher quality of life. So why am I ranting about having it around?
I’m pretty sure it’s because it’s another reminder of Father Time crashing my party. I need a bouncer to throw his tired old ass out.
I know we need this stuff, but I guess I’d just feel a whole lot better if I didn’t have to see it everywhere.
Perhaps those pretty containers are a good idea. Might we feel younger leaning on a Prada cane or a Fendi walker?
Guess I’ll pull out some of the pretty dishes I’ve stowed away and find a new use for them. One must do what one can to feel young these days. All ideas are welcome here so if you can think of some please share.
While I’m at it I think I’ll smash the ten-times magnifying mirror. No good can ever come from looking into that evil invention!
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